Remain Confident

Every morning I receive an encouraging word email from K-Love the radio station.  I look forward to these emails because in some way the scripture plays a part in my life in some way.  No matter what I am facing I can use the scripture in some way.  Well, this morning was no different. 

"Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying." Romans 12:12

My husband and I are very confident that God will heal my husband, so we are trying to be patient and we keep on praying.  So when I saw this scripture I knew God sent it for us.  On Monday, we found out a diagnosis for my husband so we are now working on the healing process.  The process will take a few months, and then he will be re-evaluated.  During these next few months we will continue praying for healing and remain confident.  We do not know what God has planned for us and we do not know if the treatments will help, but we do know that we will remain confident and continue to pray.

God is in control and we know that He will guide us in the direction we need to go.  Sometimes we reach a moment in life where we run into trouble, but we need to remain confident and continue to pray. 

"Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying." Romans 12:12   

The Fear of the Unknown

As humans we begin to let fear in our life when we lose control of situations.  My husband is a good example.  For the last ten years my husband has been in "control" of running his office and maintaining the soldiers that fall below him.  He has become accustomed to fixing problems when they arise.  If he cannot fix the problem, he will utilize the tools he has to come to a conclusion.  He has and always will be putting soldiers first.

However, God has changed his role.

My husband is now in a unit where his mission is to focus on his health and to not to worry about anything else. This is a huge blessing not only to my husband but to our family.  I am able to help my husband in many ways, and our blessings as well.  My husband's transition from Afghanistan to home life seems to be going well.

Our focus for this season of our life is the health of my husband.  Many tests are being done to find out the source of his pain.  Each test that comes back good is another sigh of relief.  However, the fear of the unknown can really take a toll on a person if they allow it.  We do not know what God has in store for us. We do not know the outcome of any of this.  But God does.  It is up to my husband and I on how we are going to handle the outcome. 

On Tuesday my husband had to receive a certain type of testing and we will not know the results until the end of this week or early next week.  I know God has a plan.  I am turning my eyes onto the Lord and looking for His strength and love to get me through.  My husband is the same way.  However, we do not the results and the fear of the unknown can begin to set in even more, and it is setting more in my husband. 

During my Bible reading on Monday evening, I came across this verse:
"They will have no fear of bad news; their hearts are steadfast, trusting in the Lord." Psalm 112:7

I cannot begin to even explain the emotions that washed over me.  I felt a sense of peace, love, and encouragement.  This verse truly speaks to our situation.  We need not to fear bad news; we need to trust in the Lord.  Regardless of the outcome I will continue to trust in my Lord Jesus Christ and continue to love Him. 

This next week I will be focusing and meditating on Psalm 112:7,

"They will have no fear of bad news; their hearts are steadfast, trusting in the Lord."  
  

Because He Loves Me

One of the hardest things I have had to do as a military spouse was to watch my husband walk out the door, knowing he will not be back for a year.  I know he can be in harms way, and there are days where we cannot talk to each other to have that reassurance that all is well.  Moments of sadness and "what ifs" can enter your mind, and you have to quickly push those away, otherwise it can consume you.  You have to put your faith in God.

Days can be a struggle when I cannot hear my  husband's voice or there is no email in my inbox.  One begins to worry.  I am not going to lie, it is tough, very tough.  However, what helps me get through the day and my sad times is Psalm 91:14 "Because he loves me," says the Lord, "I will rescue him, I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name."

Ahhh what peace washes over me when I read and re-read this scripture throughout the day (and sometimes during the night).  He is our protector in any situation that we are in.  He wraps His arms around us, protecting us, loving us.  This scripture can help in any situation that arises in our life.  We just need to put our trust and faith in Him.

Because He loves us.

This post is also linked up with iFellowship.

I Can Do All Things

I often hear from friends and family that I am strong person, and I know they are not referring to physically strength.  I face many struggles in life especially with an upcoming deployment approaching quickly.  I know that I cannot face this new struggle alone so many times a day I repeat Philippians 4:13, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." 

I know that with His strength, His guidance, His wisdom, and His love I will get through any trial that I am facing.  Yes, my husband will be gone for a year. Yes, I will become mom and now dad. Yes, I will continue to  homeschool my children.  Yes, I will continue to further my own education.  Yes, I will continue on with my daily routine called life.  Yes, I will get through it because He is right here with me with His arms wrapped around me.

So life throws us curve balls but He is there offering us strength.
  
For more Mustard Seed Planting jump on over to Mom's Mustard Seeds.

Letting Go

A few years ago when God was really working on my heart I had a hard time letting things go.  No matter how hard I tried I just could not do it.  It did not matter what it was or how long it occurred, I could not let go.  Sometimes I would try telling myself that I had forgotten or forgave that person or persons but in reality I did not.  I guess you can say I was fooling myself or try to convince myself otherwise.  I would always tell myself "God cannot forgive me until I forgive them."  It just seemed so easier said than done.  I had reached a point in my life where I was so mad and angry with myself that I did not like who I had become.  This just caused more fuel to the fire because I would say "well if that person did not do that or say that I would not be like this."  Blaming others for my own actions.  That is what I did.  Lost. Broken. Walking in a world of hurt and hurting those around me.  I wanted others who have hurt me to feel my pain.  I wanted them to see what they caused.  I wanted them to hurt.

God knew what I was doing and He healed me.

I had reached my breaking point and needed Him more than ever.  I remember praying asking Him to take my pain, sadness, anger, loneliness, hurt, and betrayed feelings away.  I just wanted one day of true happiness.  Just one day.

While in church our pastor was preaching a sermon and to be honest I cannot remember on what but it was a verse he had said that had me listening.  God was speaking to me and I needed to listen.  I wanted to be this person that did not want to hurt or be angry and He was telling me how.  He was giving me the answer.

"Jesus replied, "No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God." Luke 9:62

That was it.  Plain as day.  I had to stop looking back.  How could I be a good child of God and spread His word when I could not stop looking back?  I was not showing anyone God's love not even myself.   I had to let it go, ALL of it.

To this day I cannot remember most of the things that bothered me but I do remember some.  That is when I ask God to take it away.  All of it. 

I was very shocked this week when God was putting this scripture on my heart.  I did not understand why and still do not.  But this was a scripture that He kept bringing back to me.  But it is a scripture that had brought me out of the valley and into the palace and one day will bring me home.  Heaven with my Heavenly Father.

Please stop by Mom's Mustard Seed for some more planting!

Perfection

The past few days I have been reading on other blogs and just hearing from friends about trying to do things that we are not wired to do.  In other words trying to be something we are not then dealing with the frustration of failing.  I am guilty of falling into this category and each day I pray asking the Lord to help me.  Many days I try to be the Proverbs 31 woman and many days I fail.  I have to realize what gifts God has given me and use those and not try to make up my own.  God does not want us to be something we are not; He wants us to love Him and have a walk with Him.  I cannot do that if I am worried about being this "almighty" homemaker.  There are days where the laundry has not been done and the dishwasher not loaded but I look at what I had done that day.  It could range from having a great school day, spending time with my kids or spending extra time in my Bible reading.  I am not perfect and I will never be perfect so I need to stop trying to be perfect. 

I have heard this many of times but this week God has really put it on my heart and I have been referring to it all week.  "But God demonstrates his own love for us in this; While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8  When I worry about being "perfect" I lose sight that God still loves me even when I am a mess.  He loves me just the way I am and I thank Him for all He has done.  How many people would have their son die for us? I know of one.

For more Mustard Seed Planting jump on over to Moms Mustard Seed.

Psalm 37:7

On Friday I talked about God sending His comfort at just the right time.  If you missed it you can read it here.  A scripture was sent to me in an email on Friday and I have been keeping that scripture in my heart.  So this week I am going to memorize the entire scripture and pray on it daily. 

"Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes." Psalm 37:7

It is always so easy to become angry or jealous when we see other people getting what we want.  Watching my husband get frustrated because his number was not selected was hard.  But we have to remember that God's timing is perfect and He has plans for us.  Sometimes we may not understand those plans or wonder why it is taking so long but knowing that God wants us to be still and wait for him brings much peace.  Because I know what God has planned for me is going to be much bigger than I can imagine.  Our faith becomes stronger because we are leaning on Him and giving everything to Him.  We need to keep our eyes on the prize and that is our walk with God.  We have to stop looking at what others have and what we do not.  We need to be happy with what we already have.  We may not get what the world says we need but having my Salvation is all I want. 

Idleness

For a few months now I have been praying that God can help me with my idleness.  I do not just sit at home and do nothing that is a far cry from my life.  I know idleness means lazy but I am lazy in one area.  My problem is that I am a late sleeper and have a hard time getting out of bed at an early hour.  I have tried so hard to get up when my husband wakes up in the morning so I can get a head start on my day.  Each day I have fallen short a lot of this need for my family. 

When I wake late I have lost hours in my day to maintain my home, time with God, and the blessings schooling is sacrificed.  I feel so rushed to get things done that sometimes I am just so overwhelmed by everything that needs to be done.  I have a to do list that seems to have more things added then crossed out.  I have poor time management skills and I am praying that God will help me through this. 

I have seen God working on me getting out of bed earlier because each morning when the alarm goes off I am up.  I could get up and start getting ready for the day but then the flesh takes over.  I always talk myself out of it and then roll over and back to sleep I go.  I mean why get up when it is still dark out and knowing that the temp is in the teens' makes me want to cuddle in my bed longer.  I do not like being idle and pray for strength to overcome this.  So this week it is my goal to be up at 0600 each morning and start my day.

 Ecclesiastes 10:18 "If a man is lazy, the rafters sag; if his hands are idle, the house leaks."

This scripture is one that I will be repeating to myself all this week and this scripture will help me fight in my idleness.